© Copyright Cupideros, February 22, 2020

Words: 2,267



Currently, most definitions in the dictionary 2020 describe NIHILISM as the delusion that things (or everything, including the self) do not exist; a sense that everything is unreal.  Hold that thought for a second.


I went to the library the other day.  I am always at the library in one way or another because I find WONDER therein.  And that WONDER I find is very real.  I can feel that WONDER.  I am amazed at that WONDER.


For example, I went to the classics bookshelf and picked up a book.  The type of book poetry, prose, history, science, anthropology does not matter.  I picked up this book, say, poetry, and opened the page willing and opening myself to some joy when suddenly all the alphabets started falling out of the book!  Not only the black alphabets but words, too!  Falling one after another, the words, pulled by gravity, tumbled through the air and landed at my gym shoe feet.  You can imagine the horror I felt, the utter nihilism, at the sight of the little helpless, broken words, jutting out, at random perpendicular angles.  The pile of information was no longer applicable or discernable.  One needed to be a genius to put back all those classical poetic and WONDERful words at my feet. Quickly and carefully, I spread my feet so as not to endanger the creatures.  That’s how precious alphabets and subsequent their word equivalent held for me.


This probably was a fluke.  A lazy book repairer in the stitching department, I surmised.  So, carefully, I opened the book to another section.  Holding the page edges of the book tightly, I began reading, when the same thing occurred again!  It didn’t take long for my logic to urged me to replicate or repeat the terrible experiment by flipping more pages.  One after another, the alphabets slipped right off the white page, their crazy glue unable to hold them bound.  Words broke apart, and it is always tragic when the word LO–VE breaks in two!  LO dropped away together as if holding on to some unicorn hope of finding its partner VE.  VE lost without meaning and unable to procreate or (propagate is a better word), because the ending of a word has the responsibility of assigning a deeper meaning.  Yes.


Keen as I was to the love poem, I started reading only to find it breached birthed right before my eyes.  I looked onward at another pile of meaningless, collection of ideas, rules, visions, constructs, and broke off the establishment of authority and institutions.


Soon, the words fell out between the pages, not even open!  The classic poetry book grew lighter and lighter as its contents emptied on the library floor like spilled pressed licorice.  Oh, the tasty bunch of letters, my tongue never got to savor; nor my eyes to read.  My ears locked in the sound of silence as the message written in excellent books, before they began to be scrawled on subway walls, finished their skydiving to the floor.


In a nihilistic panic, I flipped page after page, one at a time at first; then two at a time, three; my finger skipping through a blank book.  I shut the book, but it was too late.  Knee-high black ABCs and broken words lay at my feet.  Even the words from the front and back covers dropped away in despair!


All that was left was–was nothing.  A blank book.  And that’s when I spotted the WONDER.  Regardless of the intentions of the author, I might start fresh and build another beautiful poetry book.  But that is another phase in the journey from Nihilism to WONDER. I’ll talk about it later.


For now, the quest centered around getting the words back on the pages!


To my chagrin, a particularly “woke person,” “lesbian-trans-dragqueen-story-reader-with a dash of gay and 666 binary person” walked up and offered to help.  Only in the “Clown World” does such a slipshod “identified person” randomly show up to help bring about order.  I braced myself for round two of nihilism.


She went inside her purse and pulled out a plastic rectangular of white clay.  In minutes, this “woke-being” fashioned the exact replicated size of the poetry book, and she bent down and mashed the clay onto the pile of desolate words and letters!


Her method brought about life, sort of, to the ABCs and words.  Each hoping to be carefully laid out on a drawing table backlit, as for exquisite architecture or drawing work, and carefully be assembled together for the page.  No such luck.  She “identified” the mash of words as particularly useless anyway, and therefore whatever order, the clay page stickiness took, that arrangement fits best.  She asked me for the book.


I resisted.


She tore it from my hands and gave a clown’s laugh as she mashed the clay back onto the center pages dividing the book.  How this carefully put together “woke being” came to consider the words belonged in the center, when previously they fell from several pages at once (if you had been listening clearly) was beyond me!  The first principles and still-broken words moaned.  I mourned.


Undoubtedly, this was how the “Clown World” worked in action.  Actively busy all the time, bringing about an order that is nihilistically no proper order at all.  More and more rectangular blocks of white clay she produced from her “woke-purse” as she fixed (?) page after page of mashed little black letters, and snap chatted words together.  This did not bother the “fully identified woke individual.”


After completing her work, she handed the book back to me with a smile.  “Good as new!” she exclaimed and picked up her purse and walked away.


Now, I remained skeptical the words or letters landed in the right places at my feet; hence my skepticism increased when I began reading on page one.  No doubt somehow, the word “Introduction” came outright, but the next word, “Clown,” said it all!


Standing there in the library, I knew the staff stood little chance of fixing the problem, as I noticed all the black letters and words, even the ‘conjunctions, and, but” so forth which worked to hold ideas and concepts together fell on the beige carpet floor.  The books all looked as if they’d went on an anorectic diet.  The bones of the book’s spines, covers, and blank white pages left alone to read.


Back to an earlier point, nihilism’s antidote is WONDER.  When society reaches the end of its journey into the underbelly of neglected, elegant ideas, they eventually crawl out–if they survive.  Such a time occurred a while back.  You call it the radical sixties, but actually, it was what the young people called flower power.  The flowering age of WONDER.  This occurred through an explosion of great MUSIC.  Music not like the nihilistic music of today, I might add.


Music is another WONDER.  Art, architecture, FILM, DANCE, literature, nature, even childbirth are WONDERs.  People who cannot accept the reality venture emotionally into the underbelly of nihilism.  Life has no purpose anymore.  You see, this is why religion exists.  Religion exists as a bulwark against nihilism that is bound to happen over time.  Some people cannot create unless they destroy, but having destroyed, they do not remember how to create!


What tools do they have to create again with?  What is their grand vision for their “woke-being” small limited brains?  What religion provides is a grand vision, a grand gesture, man is more than an ape!  If a man was only an ape, he’d never venture into nihilism in the first place!  Man’s capability to see the worst he is capable of becoming remains insight of the deepest kind.  The ability of man to see around the corner from nihilism keeps him focused on future potential.  A person gets up in the morning, not so much because of what he did yesterday, but what he may do excellently today!  And to do that each and every day, one needs WONDER.



People who want to create these safe spaces, and put everyone in diapers, from the teachers to the generals, scientists to bloggers, create nihilism.  People who want everyone to be perfectly equal, in fact, in reality, create nihilism.  People who espouse communism, socialism, and their ilk: hate speech, feminism, gayism, transism, dragqueenism, lesbianism, perfect equalityism, binderism, leftism, woke commercial and movies, and whate’er else twisted out of their “woke imaginations” produce nihilism.  Women feminists will never be happy because they reject the WONDER of motherhood and the feminine.  The engineer with a superior skill who knows he can never make more cash than another engineer of lesser quality will journey into nihilism.  Or in pragmatic terms, the superior skill engineer will give up producing.


In a similar vein, MGTOW’s concept of the Red Pill is under attack because it exposes ‘female nature.’  Something hereto is hidden under layers and layers of Rock songs, romantic movies, poems, books, packaging men and women to the great breeding high ground nature ultimately wants is WONDER.  Nature wants descendants, no matter the cost.  Nature does not care if a man is not an ape, but a thinking, reasoning being.  If it did, nature, God, whatever is driving, Nature, Natural Law, certainly reconsider its actions.


When a man discovers women operate under a biology imperative, much like the Star Trek Prime Directive.  “Do no harm to your future childbearing, child-raising capabilities” female prime directive reduces men to resource walking coinage.   No love exists on her part.  This fierce bending toward nature is countered by one thing: Religion.  Usually, one tries to install ethics, values, good reason to stop this female prime directive, but they fail.  Only religion holds this feminine prime directive in check.  Some may say in what way?  Think Proverb 31. Every religion has to contain the Thot Spirit or Jezebel spirit threatening to break out.  Every society that fails this test dies.


Not to worry, another society will replace it; much as Rome was replaced.  This is the nature of the battle of God against Nature!  God’s purpose is to drag man upward out of his tacit animal nature.  Nature’s mission is to keep the people coming, being born.


What a man ultimately wants is to have a YouTube wife.  That is a woman at her intellectual and reasoning best, rational, capable of holding a substantive conversation.  But, alas, those skills stopped being taught to women long, long, ago in the Victorian Age.  That training came from the Bible, albeit watered down. Now, women train themselves in GSSRM (Gossip, shame, shit-test, rumormongering, moan, and bitch about everything).  The first thing a woman wants to do when entering a relationship with a man is to “Harm” him using her mouth (shit-testing) and Thot (shit-testing) mind.


GSSRM produces nihilism in the personal relationships between men and women.

GSSRM does not (as women think) produce WONDER in the personal relationship between men and women.

This Thot mind is not submissive, and that causes deep problems in the realm of sex, but that will have to be for another blog.


Hence MGTOW!


If an MGTOW person no longer feels life has a purpose, you need to introduce them back to a sense of WONDER at being alive, music, humor, sex, art, dance, literature, film, travel, nature.  This is the reason for The Arts existence in the first place!  Remove all of The Arts, and you destroy society.  Even Communist countries had to replace the art destroyed with their own Communist version of inspirational art.



Yes, nihilism, can be beaten by WONDER.  And the world is a strange place filled with WONDER wherever you choose to look.  Sometimes, it can happen in a library when one is browsing through the history, anthropology, or poetry section.  You never know where WONDER plans to emerge since it is deeply held close to the chest of the living Gods.


A pretty girl’s face arranged ever so slightly different than all the other girl’s beautiful faces.  Or the discovery about a process of mechanization, like a bowling alley.  Perhaps, how a CD is cut or watching a highrise grow up a little bit each day.  That grass growing out of the middle of a crack in the concrete.  The stars and pictures of the universe.  Our earth view from the Moon or space station.  WONDER comes in all sizes for each of us to choose which best fills the nihilistic missing pieces.  Maybe a quote from someone you did not know or even hated.  Nietzsche’s quote: That which does not destroy you makes you stronger, for example.  Or the “RIDDLE OF STEEL.”   In Abyssarianism, it is the “Riddle of the Active Will and the Humble Spirit.”


Back to Nietzsche, I personally have my problems with Nietzsche boy; he was all over the place on concepts.  And those that the Gods will destroy they first drive mad, and the mad will generate nihilism.


Want to know what crawling out of nihilism looks like?  Simply go look at a dripped painting on a floor canvas.  The mess is ridiculous, until if you keep staring, staring, something slowly materializes, a wall in the brick.  Each brick building upon another and another until at last, one accepts the fact life is a grand experiment to raise the level of a man’s soul.

WONDER produces the ÜBERMENSCH.  And the ÜBERMENSCH produces WONDER.  Such is the nature of man when he overcomes his “apelike” tendencies.  Better yet, the man who refuses to accept Darwin’s theory that man is some kind of ape evolving to destroy those around him to survive.  Apes cannot WONDER as a man can!  Apes do not have the soul a man has!  Embrace your soul if you would escape nihilism, is a second step to be paired with the first.  And wise is he who knows the first TRUE step into WONDER.









Two people, a young female violinist and an ex-priest who no longer believes in God, made a choice as they sailed to America from Australia. This caused them to be abandoned to Makta Island, where reportedly cannibals hold rituals. The young violinist and ex-priests struggle with their environment, each other ideas, feelings, and thoughts as they try to survive until another ship passes by the island within 6 months. 98,578 words

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